Just recently, I was asked to sit down with a presidency in our stake to do a little training on ministering… the interviews, creating companionships, assignments, and inspiring the sisters to participate. To be honest, it wasn’t until I served as the ward Relief Society President that the beauty of the ministering program hit me. It’s genuinely amazing! The structure that God set up to keep all of His children in His care is absolute perfection. The ministering program is further evidence of a Father whose desire is to love and protect us as we navigate our time on earth. Serving as a minister and having ministers care for you is a HUGE perk that comes with being a member of God’s church. If only we could get the whole world to join us in this inspired system, what a wonderful world it would be!

relief society ministering tips

Ministering Thoughts & Tips for Latter-day Saints

Please understand that I do not speak for “The Church.” I’m just a random Stake Relief Society President, in this big, wide world, and I’m happy to share my personal thoughts and ideas. I always do my best to stick to the Church Handbook, so you will see information below that is pulled directly from that, along with some of my own suggestions.

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5 Tips for Creating Ministering Assignments for Relief Society:

  1. Speak with your Bishop AND Stake Relief Society President before attempting to change the format of ministering assignments (i.e. switching over to all ‘couple assignments’ or ‘ministering groups.’) Your Bishop and Stake leader’s feedback on this change is important. It’s better to ask ahead of time than to change everything later, if you find out it’s discouraged by your Bishop, Stake President or Area Authority. Ideally, stick to the tradition of two sisters as companions.
  2. If you find yourself overwhelmed with making ministering changes on the online platform, leave it to once a quarter, after ministering interviews are complete. Be sure to take good notes throughout the quarter, so you don’t forget any of the needed changes!
  3. Assignments made based on proximity (living close to each other/neighbors) aren’t always the best assignments. For example, if both the minister and sister that is ministered to are both active in the church and already friends. If that’s the case, they will support each other naturally (without an assignment given), and more good would be accomplished by giving an assignment where the “active” minister is given someone that isn’t an immediate neighbor. However, neighbor-assignments often work well when the assigned sister ‘isn’t interested’ in being reached out to. Active ministers/neighbors have a more natural reason to connect and be friends. I hope that makes sense! In general, the most dedicated ministers should be assigned to those with the greatest needs.
  4. If you have a sister who doesn’t want to be a minister, ask her who in the ward she is friendly with on a regular basis. Is it her neighbor that she chats with at the end of her driveway? Is it a sister she runs into while in the Mother’s Room during Sacrament Meeting? Is it a sister in the ward who has a kid on the same sports team as hers? Who does she already talk to without having to be intentional? Find out who that is and assign her to minister to that friend. She will be surprised to find out that she is doing her ministering 100%! She is less likely to avoid your ministering interviews. It’s a great little solution to help inspire and teach the sister that ministering is simply being a true friend. We can all be successful at that!
  5. If a companionship struggles to align their schedules and minister together, I personally feel like it’s totally fine for them to both reach out to their sister separately. In fact, if I was their sister, I would probably prefer it that way, as I’m more of a one-on-one type of gal. As a RS President, I would just like knowing that there are TWO ministers available to reach out to, should their sister need help. Plus, there are TWO friends that their sister has in the ward. I’m less concerned that companions are reaching out together, at the same time. But, that’s just me.

Including Young Women in the Ministering Program:

Handbook: A young woman may serve as a ministering companion to a Relief Society sister when the young woman is willing and able. She may begin serving in the year she turns 14. The Relief Society presidency counsels with the young woman, her parents, and the Young Women presidency as they consider ministering assignments.

Including Young Women in the ministering program can be a tricky thing, based on my own experience and the RS Presidents’ feedback in our stake. It seemed to be a bit easier when the program was Visiting Teaching, when it was more formal. But, now that we are focused on ‘natural,’ ‘true-friend’ interactions, women aren’t finding it very natural to have a teenager by their side. It’s not easy for a sister to open up to her minister in those situations and it can also be awkward for the youth, as well. I would love to see the youth have their own ministering program, some day, still guided by their parents, but for now, we stick to and support the General Handbook.

With that said, I’ve put together a list of ideas for ministering with Young Women in companionships. Hopefully, it give you some ideas! I also love the Handbook suggestion of creating the assignment, after having discussions with the youth, her parents, and the Young Women’s president.

All About the Relief Society Ministering Interview:

The Church’s handbook used to say that ministering interviews should be held throughout the quarter, not saved for the end. But recently, that changed. Yay! Cause, I wasn’t doing it that way. When I was the ward RS President, I still had all 7 of my children at home, and I was homeschooling half of them.  I found it more manageable to do all the interviews during the last month of each quarter, rather than think about it every month of the year. However, you can do whatever suits you best!

Planning and Preparing for the Interview:

  • Pray for the sister you will be interviewing. Ask that the Spirit be with you during your conversation to guide you and to help the Sister feel your love for her, as well as God’s love.
  • There are many ways to conduct a ministering interview. While I served as Relief Society President, I liked to switch things up. We rarely did the same style of interview twice in a row. But, that’s just because I love change and trying new things. You can definitely keep it the same every time, if it’s effective at building connection between yourself and the sister being interviewed. If it’s helpful, I have an entire blog post on creative ministering interview ideas!

How to Conduct a Ministering Interview (per the Handbook):

  • Counsel about the strengths, needs, and challenges of assigned individuals and families.

  • Discuss ways to help persons prepare to receive ordinances if needed.

  • Consider how the elders quorum, Relief Society, ward council, and others might help.

  • Minister to ministering sisters. Show love and appreciation. Teach and encourage them. Help them grow in their capacity to receive and act upon revelation in their service.

My Personal Ministering Interviewing Tips:

  1. Consider not using the word “interview,” if your sisters seem intimidated by it. It can be a “ministering chat,” “ministering visit,” or anything that seems less professional, without taking away from what the experience is.
  2. When possible, give notice of the upcoming interview. Maybe one to two weeks? This allows Sisters to do some last-minute reaching out and find a spot on their schedule that is convenient for them. Ideally, the ‘reaching out’ has already been happening. But realistically, some women will use that time to cram, and any information about their assigned sister is better than no information. Having some time/notice can help relieve some of the anxiety surrounding being interviewed.
  3. During your discussion, be mindful of ways that you can support the minister in her calling. Does she need an introduction to her assigned sister? Is she in need of a new assignment? Has she tried praying for her sister regularly? Is the Spirit helping you to discern where this ministering sister may be struggling in her own faith? Remember, you are ministering to the ministers. Your support, guidance, patience, and love will result in an increase of ministering success in your ward.
  4. Help the minister understand the difference between ministering and visiting teaching. Often times, simply UNDERSTANDING the concept helps the minister realize they’re doing better than they thought they were OR that it’s more doable than they realized. (Ministering is natural, Spirit-led, flexible, personalized, informal or formal, in home or elsewhere. The minister, through prayer and getting to know her assigned sister, can determine the frequency and best method of contact.)
  5. Before ending your visit, ask the sister if there’s anything you can pray about for her… and, be sure to actually say the prayers! This is a beautiful way to show your love and serve the minister. 

After the Interview (per the Handbook):

  • The Relief Society president and the elders quorum president should be meeting with the bishop quarterly after these interviews to make sure that members’ needs are appropriately met through ministering assignments.
  • Elders quorum and Relief Society presidencies meet quarterly to discuss needs of individuals and families learned through ministering interviews.
  • As needed, elders quorum and Relief Society leaders counsel with the ward council regarding strengths and needs identified in ministering interviews and make and enact plans to serve and bless ward members. When needed, Relief Society and elders quorum presidents discuss with the ward council information shared by ministering sisters and brothers. As they do, they respect members’ requests for confidentiality.

Tips for Getting Ministering to Happen in Ward Relief Societies:

  1. Call a Ministering Secretary to set appointments and share regular thoughts (via your communication method) about ministering. It could be a spiritual thought, ministering ideas for the month, a ministering sister spotlight, a success story, etc. Keeping ministering ‘top of mind’ will help a lot. 
  2. Be open to change. If a minister is doing all she can to connect with her assigned sister, with no progress, it can be quite discouraging. Also, that’s one person (her sister) that is not being looked after. It’s more important to find someone that may have better luck with the assigned sister than to be firm on the assignment. We don’t want the ministers to feel guilty when they’ve been doing their best. Just make a change! 
  3. Often times, ministers don’t know where to start with their assigned sister. Could you introduce them to each other? Could you share some non-sensitive information about their sister to them, to spark some conversation or visit ideas? Could you hold a small little get together at your home with the companionship and all the sisters they minister to? Keep it simple. A short visit for cookies, breakfast smoothies, or paninis and new friends. Or, meet at Costa Vida! 
  4. As mentioned above, if you have a sister that does not want to be a minister, maybe you could set them up for success!? Find out who they are friends with in the ward and let them be that sister’s minister (with their permission, of course.) They likely have to change nothing, as they are already friends, and they can feel like they are successful in ministering. 
  5. Remember to let the minister know when you find out about a ‘need’ their assigned sister has. Even if you notice their sister seems down or absent from church, maybe suggest they reach out and ‘let you know’ how it goes. Ministers are often open to direct requests from the Presidency. 
  6. Keep things light and loving. The gospel is a gift and something to be joyful about. Set an example of truly enjoying Relief Society and ministering. Your positive mindset will be infectious and spread throughout your ward. Encourage your presidency to turn up their positivity dial, as well. We have ample reason to rejoice in Christ!

Have you seen this video? It’s a great little lesson on reaching out with love…

 

If you liked this post on ministering in Relief Society, check out: 

  1. Family Home Evening Lesson on Ministering
  2. Your Personalized Call to Hasten the Work
  3. Over 26 Calling Ideas for Latter-day Saint Wards

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